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Trying to build some boundaries

Honestly you step away from the computer for 5 minutes and the next thing you know it’s been over a week since you last blogged…

Ooops

I have been doing a bit of thinking whilst I’ve been away and realised that one of the reasons I am feeling so overwhelmed by work is that I am letting it overwhelm me

It is one thing being flexible and accommodating and it is entirely another to let it take over your entire life

My so-called Easter holiday was a great example of this – I ended up working a day and a half out of 4 days off and ended up feeling pressured and underappreciated, I’m not even sure my efforts will get any recognition from anyone

I need to start saying no (eek) and meaning it – easier said than done

I have made some progress – having had to work last Friday (technically my day off) I took a day off on Monday to compensate and I didn’t dial into a meeting that I normally would have done and I only checked my email a couple of times. AND the world didn’t come to an end (although I did miss one bit of useful information but that is more to do with Bossman not updating me when I’d asked to catch up before our 8am session today)

Baby steps by baby steps and maybe will we will get somewhere

I have already told anyone who will listen that we are going away for halfterm to the back of beyond with no mobile phone coverage – we shall see how that goes…

I’ve been struggling with anxiety levels again – twitchy and shaky are becoming the new normal and I know I can’t go on like this for too long. To try and combat it I’m trying to keep to a list of Spring resolutions – to exercise a bit more, to remember to take my vitamins, to get outside for 15 minutes and to carve out half an hour for something I enjoy. It isn’t working yet but I know that more running = less twitchiness, again I just have to say no and find ways to find time for it during the day

So possibly a little progress, a few things to keep trying to do and perhaps a way of finding a balance between work and life?

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4 Comments

  1. But it’s so bloody hard to say ‘no’ & sound like you mean it isn’t it?! We sound similar in many ways & I am such a control freak, I end up working when I should be off too! We recently went to Devon for the week & it’s the first holiday I’ve had in 4 years where I didn’t take my work phone. Because of this I felt like I properly switched off & relaxed – not the type of ‘almost relaxation’ where ‘I just need to check my phone to see if anything has happened’. I hope you get this when you go away, because twitchy & shaky were becoming the norm for me too & that’s territory I didn’t want to enter.
    The world will go on without us being contactable, it’s just a bit of a leap of faith. Whats the worst that could happen?!*

    *I realise I have no idea what your job is, so the consequences may be bigger than I imagine!! ;-)

    Reply
  2. I won’t pretend I have all the answers, and the last thing I want to sound is patronising (or smug), but sounds like you are definitely on the right path. When I worked four days, it probably took me a good six months before I got to the stage where my team “grasped” it properly. The key is definitely being consistent (disciplining colleagues and children has a lot in common there!). I do have to admit that I did have a fab team and boss who supported me, so your struggle is probably ten times harder.
    Anyway, like I said, sounds like you’re on the right tracks, and I’m rooting for you x

    Reply
  3. I’m sure loads of people can identify with this post. Hope you find your balance and the anxiety levels take a back step. Has been a week since I last found the time to blog too (again)

    Reply
  4. I reckon this will definitely help with how angry you have been feeling.
    I know it might not make you the most ‘convenient’ of employees, but a walk over who puts themself out unreasonably is also not valued either.
    Your resolutions sound great. Hows about adding in a little ‘pause’? Either a zen meditation (being aware when you make a cup of tea or have a shower’, or maybe a meditation on your phone that you can do while standing in a packed commuter train (possibly not the ideal environment … perhaps later on before bed!).

    Reply

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