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Bigger boobs or a bigger brain?

Admittedly I come at this one from a slightly warped experience – during my pregnancy and breastfeeding days my boobage expanded to a frankly horrifying 34H as in H for humungous so I have been there and done enormous norkage.

I’ve also spent over a decade in the City and experienced the delights for presenting my considered thoughts to a group of male colleagues only to have them never raise their eyes above the 2nd button on my shirt (and this wasn’t one of those occasions when I’d had a button pop open under the strain).

So I think it’s far to say that I know a fair bit about the benefits or not of having bigger boobs.


I also have experienced my brain disappearing into a fug of milk brain and taking a very long time to come out of it*.  What they don’t tell you about extended breastfeeding is that it does impair your mental capabilities.  How I managed to get promoted, hired into a new job, tackle that job and continue building my professional reputation whilst under this fog I really don’t know.  All I know is that before I stopped breastfeeding I couldn’t remember where I’d parked my car in the station carpark by the time I got back there in the evening, a couple of weeks after Littler weaned I could clearly remember EXACTLY where  I had parked that morning.


So I have had both sides of seeing how having a better brain and bigger boobs works out.


And trust me, go for brain every single time.  It doesn’t put a strain on your back, you can out-think an amnesic goldfish and you don’t sit at work having forgotten technical terms that are absolutely essential to having a discussion about what you do.


But sadly it appears that a third of women would rather have the bigger boobs than a higher IQ  or even swap their IQ to achieve their dream dress size.

Is it because women are now purely defined by the magnificence of their cleavage?  Is it because the likes of Katie Price are so visible and young women can clearly see advantages of having bigger boobs?  Is it because there aren’t really a whole lot of intelligent female role models?  Could it be that the lads culture seems to value cup size over being an articulate, intelligent, thoughtful companion?


I have to admit it must be an awful lot easier to imagine what life would be like with a bigger chest – we’ve all done the teenage girl thing of shoving a pair of socks down our training bras to give the impression of a mightier chest.  Far easier than trying to imagine what having a bigger brain might look like.

Because let’s be brutally honest the size of your brain doesn’t really show on the superficial outside, the weight of your thoughts doesn’t show up easily on the cover of Grazia and there is a paucity of women out there, showing they are at the top of their game and conquering the world.


We need to stop apologising for being good at our jobs, opinionated and articulate.

We need to stop making out that the women who are succeeding are unusual and a little bit different from the rest of us.


We need to embrace being brainy and remember that being the dork at school can translate into being the type of woman who take on the world.

And we need to tell our daughters that opinions rock, not implants.



* I got pregnant with Bigger, nursed her, got pregnant again whilst still nursing and then breastfed Littler for 18 months – my poor old body and brain really didn’t stand much of a chance.

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20 comments to Bigger boobs or a bigger brain?

  • Lou

    So well said….I do get fed up with the assumption that I am not an intelligent person and have over the years become extremely defensive about it all.

    Just because I don’t want to spend hours talking politics, does not mean that I am not intelligent. Just because I have chosen childcare as my profession doesn’t mean that I am any less intelligent – putting the bricks in place for the future in 2 and 3 year olds is actually pretty important work if you ask me…lol

    I do hate it when assumptions are made over intelligence levels. I like to act the fool and enjoy my life – it was so shit for so long why shouldn’t I get some pleasure from it now? Why shouldn’t I lark about with my kids and sing and dance in the car if I want to – it’s multi-tasking don’t you know…

    I have boobs too – 36 D boobs to be precise. I also have an IQ of 147, but I’m not about to let that stop me having some fun!

    Lou 🙂

  • I really hope that this survey was somehow misread. That can’t possibly be the public’s opinion!

  • […] Bigger boobs or a bigger brain? That is the question posed by Muddling Along Mummy. We know which one we’d choose. How about you? […]

  • Emily O

    I’ve ‘sufffered’ all my life with small boobs, I spent my teens and twenties being jealous of women who could fill a bra properly. Then three lots of breastfeeding in quick succession gave me an insight into bigger boobs. I wasn’t a fan. Luckily I love having smaller boobs again now and I like to think my brain is big instead. And I like being able to run upstairs to get quickly something without getting black eyes. As for women who’d prefer bigger boobs, the survey is a bit depressing but – hey – let the women with the bigger brains step into the void. Less competition isn’t it? ; )

  • I always imagined it would be nice to have both, being rather more blessed in the brain department than with boobs – until, as you say, pregnancy and breastfeeding took over and the switch was made. How I hated it! I’m ever so sorry for my deflated little ones that now struggle to fill a 34B and need constant propping up with an extra-filled, padded reinforced bra, but it’s more than compensated for by getting back my brain. What you write about your memory going with breastfeeding is utterly true – I have no idea how you managed to get promoted and hold down a job at all during early motherhood so your brain must have been very special to start with! It’s a sorry state of affairs that women would trade their brain for bigger boobs.

  • Oh, that’s my brain has woken up again, suddenly! It’s still not quite back to it’s former glory, but I am remembering things a lot more. I wonder if there’s been any research on it? As I understand it, there’s been research on the having a baby makes you lose your memory and it was shown to be untrue, though there was speculation that the associated lack of sleep did contribute. However, I don’t know if there was any correlation with breastfeeding or not.

    Anyway, I have big boobs. I quite like them, though they have definite disadvantages – finding clothes that actually fit and being able to run for a bus without walloping yourself in the eyes would be nice, for example. But I would definitely prefer to keep my brain – or even get a bigger one.

    • Milk brain was strange – felt like I was ok but only with hindsight that I’ve realised that life was a bit foggy really

      Big boobs – well nice to have a ‘shapely figure’ but there are times when I’d like to be able to run down the stairs without a bra on!

  • Oh i do despair with surveys like this… I find it amazing that some women have such low expectations of themselves that they think having bigger boobs will help them thru life…

    I have so many friends who would love not to have big boobs.. The grass is not always greener….

  • People just don’t stop to think that beauty isn’t forever. Getting old is about wisdom, and wisdom is beautiful. I fed my two boys and now my, once pretty gigasmic (that’s big and gorgeous in one) boobs are no more. but i actually couldn’t give that much of a fig about it.


  • I think anyone who chooses bigger boobs over a higher IQ needs a higher IQ.

  • You absolutely have to enter the giveaway on my blog at the moment. Perfect timing!

    And is “enormous norkage” a technical term?

  • Great post, but what a sad reflection of society. I actually think things are not so bad in Britain as in a lot of other places. In Spain it is the norm for men to look you up and down when you are speaking, the women there just seem to accept it. Young women today see celebs who seem to have it all for very little work and this must seem appealing. It is no coincidence that most of these celebs have had breast implants so that is where the association begins.

    Although I like to look nice, I value my brain far higher than my body or looks. I suppose that is just how I was brought up.

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