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Happy un-Valentines day

I don’t consider myself to be a particularly needy person – yes I do like the occasional bit of positive feedback or a compliment on how I look but I’m not out there begging for my ego to be massaged regularly.

Valentines day should be easy to write off as just another day.  I’m happy in my marriage, comfortable in this relationship and since we’ve been together nearly 15 years these things are probably consigned to the file marked ‘things we used to do’.

Trouble is that it is so much easier to say than to do.

Normally I’d take advantage of Valentines being one of only a handful of dates when I can be sure we can both get out of work at a reasonable time* to have a nice night in with some cheese and wine and to avoid the whole commercial-fest that Valentines eating out has become.

Except this year Mr Muddling is away and it is a little bit harder to just shrug and say today means nothing.  I’m not even sure if, in amongst his all consuming current work project, he has even realised what is going on – he muttered something about ‘are we doing it?’ at the weekend but to be fair that might have been about unloading the dishwasher.

I’m home alone again this week – the attraction of having total control over what to watch and what to eat for supper has rather faded after doing that all of last week too.  The downsides of it just being me vs. the girls at bedtime and overnight have grown day by day – it hasn’t been as bad as it could have been (TOUCH WOOD!) but it is still nice to have someone to share the burden.

I guess the trouble is that it is one thing to shun Valentines as part of a happy, joint boycotting duo.  It is quite another thing to be on your own, knowing that your partner is somewhere else and too busy to talk and in any event hasn’t realised that today has any more significance than tomorrow or yesterday.

I shall be spending tonight on my own, with my book, some wine and some chocolate and getting on with my crochet.  Deep down I’m hoping that he will get in touch or he will remember when he comes home at the end of the week.

So who’s up for sharing one of those rather scrummy looking M&S meals for 2?



*admittedly Valentines does mark the anniversary of my first all-nighter 12 years ago…

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9 comments to Happy un-Valentines day

  • Count me in! Stuck at home with a poorly Bigger today, so need something to look forward to…although Husband just asked me to make lentil soup on his way out the door…ack, he can have the lentil soup and I’ll share an M&S meal with you!

  • Oh hun, I must say I’m not blase about Valentine’s Day anymore having spent three years on my own with just the kids. I was even dumped by a boyfriend on Valentine’s Day once. Completely understand how you feel and thinking of you. Vix x

    • It’s not that I mind, it’s more that I am a bit of an optimist and keep thinking perhaps he might surprise me. Turns out the package at the courier desk this morning wasn’t from him but an engagement letter from my client… bother

  • Tonight my hubby is not only away from home, but is in bloody South America on a week-long business trip. Raising a glass to you from here in Helsinki 🙂

  • Karen

    I’m with you….its tough. I’ve been married for a decade and together 14 years too and I have to confess I haven’t given much thought to the day for a few years (post-children!). But I’ve been on my own Mon to Fri with two 4 year olds for 6 months now and the situation is wearing thin. That said – I did contemplate a romantic surprise tonight driving 2 hours up the M1 to surprise my DH but the lure of the sofa and an early night won out! Give him his due – he did hide and leave a lovely card…its the thought that counts and all that!!

    • Exactly – it wears thin

      Nice thought to surprise but can understand the lure of the sofa – I’m in my PJs in my armchair and not really missing the whole having to do the couple thing. I shall be mentioning that G left a card!

  • Juliet

    Manchild is running if it helps and passed me a SWATCH WATCH. I have bought him a card, but he didn’t give me one so you know what – I’m not doing it … HA! Tit for Tat! See you tomorrow beautiful. X

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