I don’t remember there being a conversation where we discussed who would be the supported worker, the one that didn’t have to make the majority of compromises and worry about whether there was childcare in place.
In fact, thinking about it it appears there never was a conversation and Mr Muddling seems to have just assumed that because I’ve had a couple of bouts of maternity leave I must be the supporter and he the supported, that I do the night wakings and he sleep through them, that I keep the home fires burning and he brings home the bacon.
Which is all very well whilst I’m at home full time but when I’m working doesn’t really seem fair.
Especially given I earn more than he does, I’m moving into a more secure job, I have great career prospects compared to his rather shaky job expectations.
So why have I got stuck with the worries about childcare?
Why am I the one who has to sprint out of the office of an evening?
Why am I the one who has to co-ordinate to make sure there is cover when I have late meetings / work functions?
Why can’t I just sit back and assume that someone else (Mr Muddling perhaps?) will sort it out?
Why is it despite my feminist leanings I find myself occupying an almost 1950’s housewife role within what should be an equal partnership?
Where on earth did I go wrong and how can I fix this?
Alternatively, does anyone know where I can find a wife?