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>What does a Mummy have to get a rest?


I guess its a hangover from my working life that I sort of view the weekends as a chance to have some time off, to relax and to recover before the week starts again.

Which tends to mean that I find myself on a Monday morning feeling more than a little resentful that the weekends haven’t meant I have had a rest.

When we just had Toddlergirl, we had it worked out that I got a lie in on a Saturday and Mr had a lie on Sunday whilst I took her to church.  For some reason now we have Babygirl this seems to have fallen away.  In fact I’m not even getting an afternoon nap now.

Mr always seems to get in first with the fact he needs a rest, seems to be able to switch off from it all quicker and doesn’t seem to feel the need to soldier on.

And I’m quietly seething that I don’t seem to have any allowance made for the fact I’m still doing several night feeds, still the person dealing with Toddlergirl waking and so having significantly less sleep than he is.  Admittedly I’m not working every day yet but caring for children isn’t exactly a day at the spa.

What does it take to get a break around here?

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11 comments to >What does a Mummy have to get a rest?

  • Mwa

    >I think it might take a demand. Oh yes. Mr needs to be told.

  • Susie

    >Hugs hun!

    I think you just need to speak to your hubby and tell him your needs and ask him what he would suggest. His offer will probably be better than something you would suggest.

    If not-just tell him you need 30 minutes a day on your own, or you need a lie in or afternoon nap twice a week and schedule it on the calender. (I have a calender on my refrigerator.)

    Holding it in and being a martyr will get you nowhere just more frustrated.

    Hang in there!

  • Jen

    >The only way to get is break is to actually leave the house. I have 3 children, two of them are the ages of your two and even if I do get a break here (and my husband really does try to give me one) someone is still looking for me. So I leave the house for even just an hour and go buy myself a cup of coffee. That one hour every weekend keeps me sane. Being a Mum is very hard work, it gets easier when the kids go to school! Take care. Jen.

  • Brit in Bosnia / Fraught Mummy

    >You still need a chance to recuperate a bit. Mr. Muddling needs to be told that you need your Saturday morning rests again.

    I get my rest on Sunday. Yesterday I slept for nearly 11 hours. I hadn't realised just how tired I actually was.

    Good luck. You need sleep, especially when you are looking after children. There is no hiding after all. Unlike when you are at work!

  • Heather

    >its hard, isnt it? I know my husband works hard long physical hours and needs his rest but damn it, so do I!

  • Crystal Jigsaw

    >Why do men do this? Can't they actually see that mums need a rest too. I don't think they think about mums needing to recharge her batteries. Even the most patient and understanding of men don't think!!

    CJ xx

  • platespinner

    >I feel for your – we've had similar issues in the past. We've got a very similar set up to what you described you had with alternate lie-ins on the weekend (depending on how long we can keep monkey from storming the stairs), but not sure if that arrangement will survive another baby.

    I agree with others – you need to make it clear you both need rest. I used to find the resentment and anger would build up and just make me even more tired.

  • Muddling Along Mummy

    >Thanks – I do need to sit down and explain, its just not healthy sitting and getting crosser and tireder (and yes, I should be in bed now not on the computer!)

    We shall see …

  • auntiegwen

    >Poor you x would it cheer you up if I tell you that when they're teenagers you couldn't get them out of bed without a waterhose?

  • manicmum

    >I know what you mean – sometimes you just know they're not going to be receptive to your pleas for mercy/time off for good behaviour. I sometimes 'book' time off to meet a friend for coffee on a saturday. I think the ManChild resents it but grits his teeth. Don't tell anyone but I look forward to Mondays when the kids are at school/nursery. Weekends can be hard. Another black mark for me!! x

  • Laura McIntyre

    >I completly understand , i am lucky these days as during the week my older girls are in nursery and my son naps so i get 2 hours to rest and relax. Weekends i always feel should be less stressful as hubby is home but are actually more stressful and i get almost no time to sit .

    I have just given up on getting long lies or naps or even a lunch break , i sometimes think they expect us to be super human and able to cope with little sleep or me time.

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